In a day and age that finds pretty much everyone dating online and working their way through what feels like an endless parade of folks with meet-up potential, dates really tend to blend into one another after a while. This is especially the case for women, as so many men don’t bother to put the least little bit of effort into things.
That said, a man who really wants to stand out in all the right ways should focus on planning truly memorable first dates that will set him apart from the rest of the crowd. The following are just a few things that most woman would associate with an ideal first date. First impressions matter, so listen, learn, and take note.
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1. She wants to get to know you.
This is really the point behind any first date, isn’t it? Chances are you’ve already spent a little time chatting, texting, or perhaps even talking on the phone. You both feel like there might be a connection. Now it’s time to get together, explore the possibilities, and see if you’re right.
So, while it might seem like a no-brainer, the thing your date wants most out of her evening with you is to go home feeling like she actually got to know you better. Tell her about yourself, and give her thoughtful answers to any questions she asks. Be yourself, and give her a chance to see the real you – the guy she’ll be spending so much more time with if everything works out.
2. She wants you to get to know her, too.
Most women have been on more than their fair share of dates where the guy spent so much time and energy talking about himself, he didn’t even think to ask her much about herself. So while you do want to help your date get to know you, you should be aware that she’d like a chance to talk about herself, as well.
Ask her thoughtful questions about herself, really listen to the answers, and ask a few follow-up questions about any details that interest you. Conversations go two ways, but you’d never know that from the way most guys behave on dates. So if you can set yourself apart in this way, you’re already halfway to a second date.
3. She wants to be pampered a little.
A woman doesn’t necessarily need to be looking for a top-tier sugar daddy to appreciate a guy who knows how to go the extra mile. Even the strongest, smartest, most independent woman sometimes dreams of finding herself out on a date with a man who actually knows how to treat a lady, so you’ll definitely score some points by going out of your way a little.
Take the lead in small, chivalrous ways. Open the car door for her, or offer her your coat if she says she’s cold. Unless she absolutely insists on splitting the expenses for the evening, pick up the tab yourself and pay for both of you. And be sure to put some thought into the date you plan, as well. Show her she was worth putting in a little effort.
4. She wants to see proof that you’re a good man.
When a woman agrees to go out on a date with a man she’s only spoken to over chat or text before, she’s looking for more than just an opportunity to get to know him better. She’s also going to be looking for proof that he’s a good guy – that’s there’s no glaring red flags, that he’s not going to do her dirty before throwing her away like so many other guys have done before.
That means she’s going to be on the lookout for all the usual red flags. She wants to see whether you’re one of those men who’s nice to his date but rude to the wait staff at the restaurant. She also wants to make sure you’re not “that guy” who starts complaining about how every last one of his exes was crazy. So show her you’re good people however you can.
5. She wants to have a good time.
Everyone – man or woman – has been on lots of dates where things just simply didn’t flow nicely. Keeping up a conversation on dates like those is like pulling teeth, especially when there just isn’t any chemistry there to speak of, romantic or otherwise. So if you can simply show your date a really good time, you’ll already be setting yourself apart in all the right ways.
Keep the mood light, fun, and breezy. Make her laugh and smile. Or maybe just make sure your agenda for the evening includes a really fun activity that gives you something simple and enjoyable to bond over. Wonderful women want great men in their lives who can make sure there’s always something to smile about. Show her you’re one of them, and you’re golden.
