On average, more than 780,000 couples get divorced every single year in the United States. However, when you’re the one going through it, it can often feel like you’re alone.
The good news is that you’re not! Even if you don’t have anyone in your life that has been through what you’re going through right now, there are resources available to help you navigate this stressful time.
That’s where this divorce guide comes into play. Keep reading to learn about both the practical steps to take in the wake of ending your marriage and the ways to take care of yourself emotionally during this time.
The first step towards the next chapter of your life starts now.
How to Make Divorce Easier: The Practical Steps
Even if you’re the one who initiated the divorce process, it can still feel like a shock to your system. There are a few things you should do immediately to make the process easier.
Gather Important Documents
There’s a lot of paperwork involved in a divorce. You’ll want to make sure you gather up as many documents as you can, to help get the ball rolling. These documents might include:
- Bank statements
- Tax returns
- Mortgage statements
- Children’s birth certificates
- Loan documents
You never know how your spouse might act during the divorce proceedings, so make sure you have access to all important documents. If you don’t have the physical copies yourself, try to get digital copies if you can.
Find a Divorce Attorney
When it comes to navigating the legal aspects of a divorce, you’ll want a professional on your side.
Start by talking with a few different lawyers so you get an idea of what it might be like to work with them.
You can ask divorced family members or friends if they have an attorney to recommend or read through online reviews when looking for someone to represent you.
Once you’ve found a lawyer you can trust, they’ll help you determine if you have a contested divorce or a non-contested one, and help you proceed accordingly.
And, if you have kids, they can help you navigate the often stressful process of coming to a child custody agreement.
Open a New Bank Account
Many married couples have joint bank accounts for shared funds. If that’s the case for you, you’ll want to open a new, private account in your name only.
This helps to ensure that your spouse won’t have access to any money coming to you once you’ve decided to go through the divorce process.
It also helps to prevent your spouse from keeping money away from you and limiting your access to a joint account. Even if your divorce is amicable, it’s a good idea to make sure you have your own money set aside.
Update Your Will
There’s a good chance that your spouse is listed as your beneficiary on your will and any other important legal documents like a life insurance policy.
In the midst of everything else going on during a divorce, it can be very easy to overlook changing your will, but it’s an important step to take.
Make sure you get an attorney to make the updates so there’s no confusion if the worst-case scenario happens. And, make sure to think about anything else that may list your spouse as a beneficiary or point of contact and make the updates accordingly.
Taking Care of Yourself After a Divorce
While all of the legal and practical items we mentioned above are important, self-care after a divorce is critical as well.
Even if you’re happy to be getting divorced, it’s natural to grieve the end of your marriage and have a difficult time in the process. Knowing how to cope emotionally is key.
Consider Therapy
Getting divorced brings about a lot of significant life changes. This can be a good time to start meeting with a therapist to talk about these changes and how you’re dealing with them.
Having a neutral party to talk to about your feelings can help you process the ending of your marriage and develop healthy coping mechanisms as you start a new portion of your life.
Take Time for Yourself
When you’re in a serious, long-term relationship, it’s only natural to lose sight of some of the things you used to love when you were single. And, if you factor in working and taking care of kids, you might feel like you’ve lost yourself over the years.
Now is a great time to get back to the version of yourself before marriage and rediscover some of the things you lost along the way.
Or, you might want to explore new things that didn’t feel possible before, like new foods your spouse didn’t like or venturing out into singles groups to meet new people.
Rediscovering yourself after a divorce can be a cathartic and fulfilling path.
Find Your Group
As the old saying goes, it takes a village. You’ll want to use this time to find a solid group of people on whom you can depend.
Reconnect with girlfriends, make an effort to spend more time with your siblings, or join a meet-up group for people who have gone through a divorce.
By forging new friendships and strengthening new ones, you’ll form a solid group of reliable people who will always have your back.
Remember It’s Not Forever
In the midst of a divorce, it can feel like your life will never go back to “normal.” But, it will.
Eventually, the hurt feelings will fade and you’ll have a new chapter of your life that’s full of exciting, new possibilities. While it might not seem like it in the moment, you might find that your divorce is one of the best things to have happened to you.
This Divorce Guide Is Here to Help
As you go through your divorce, come back to reference this divorce guide as needed. It can serve as a good reminder of what you need to do and how far you’ve already come.
Looking for more helpful guides like this? Check out our other articles today.
